I once had a girlfriend that asked me if I would train her if she signed up at my gym. Since she hadn?t exercised in years, I was generally excited that she was taking an interest in her health again and that she had asked me for help.
After two or three training sessions and one massive fight later, we never worked out again. That was also the last time I figure to help a lady friend out at the gym, but if you?re look for better luck than I had, Men?s Fitness.com offers these exercise tips for couples that want to work out together.
1.) Forget your own training.
“If you’re trying to show off by demonstrating how much you can lift, you’re going to have problems,” says Rachel Cosgrove, a strength and conditioning coach and co-owner of Results Fitness in Santa Clarita, Calif. “She wants you to pay attention to her.” This means concentrating on moves that she can do and enjoy (unless you want a dumbbell dropped on your foot).2.) Say the right things.
Feed her compliments?and try to ensure that she processes them as such. “Don’t say, ‘Wow, your arms are getting so big,’ or, ‘You’re looking really buff!'” says Cosgrove. “If a woman hears that, she might never come back with you to the gym.” Instead, reinforce her work by telling her that her arms are really “toned,” or that her legs are “defined.”3.) Know what she wants.
Her goals are to burn calories and fat, and get more “shapely.” So take it easy on the isolation exercises, use lighter weights and higher reps, and keep her moving. “Women are multitaskers,” says Cosgrove. “They want combination exercises, compound movements, and circuit sets.” In terms of body parts, she’s concerned with her legs, glutes, and?most of all?abs. “As much as guys love the bench press, that’s how much women love ab work,” says Joe Stankowski, a trainer of pageant contestants in Wilmington, Del. So grab a Swiss ball and crunch!4.) Disguise the workout.
Women often fear weights, so hide weight training in moves like medicine-ball squats and med-ball overhead presses. You can also use those colored, plastic kettlebells for figure eights and swings. And here are always cable moves like wood chops. She will find these exercises more fun and less intimidating, and she won’t feel like she’s turning into the Incredible Hulkette.
To read the rest of MF.com?s tips, click here.
Interesting article….Maybe a fight broke out due to your lack of training skills and the fact that you may not have known what you were doing, and reading the first few lines of your article, honestly, you seem a little full of yourself. Please post a picture so we can see the full benefits of your body and what the gym has done for you. OR, here is a thought….Maybe you just got on her nerves ???? I think that sounds a little more like it.!!!
Keep writing these insightful articles, I do enjoy reading them.
S M,
Man, I wonder why this sounds so personal when it didn’t need to be?!
There was no need for an attack here and since you sound bitter in nature, I won’t respond. It’s just not worth it.
Your comment was a joke and your attempt to insult me was sad at best.
I stumbled upon this article thru my current trainer, only because he found it funny and wanted me to read it. I commented on it, because I found your intro to be quite comical and it hit close to home.My girlfriend and I work out together quite a bit, and dude, no offense (obviously there was some taken) but you do sound full of yourself.
Relax Stalter…people have the right to comment. I just wont read your articles anymore, not a big deal.
Stefan
Stefan,
You’re right – you have every right to comment, as I have every right to respond when someone who doesn’t even know me suggests that I’m full of myself based on an intro as general as this one.
If I would have wrote, “Let me start off by saying that I’m 6’4, 200-pounds and am hung like a horse…” then you would have been justified calling me out for being full of it. But I didn’t, which again, leads me to wonder why you made this personal.
You’re reaching with every one of your comments.
From my experience, I agree with the writer here. Couples tend to bicker when there is something involving the man directing the woman or vice versa. I think couples can workout together, but one shouldn’t train the other and both have to be of similar conditiong.
I also agree that the first comment seems personal like an ex-girlfriend or maybe a jealous new boyfriend. There wasn’t much that the man said in his article other than he tried it and it didn’t work.
Methinks SM is someone who knows Stalter in real life and has it in for him. His comments are petty and not related to content.
Thanks for the support, fellas.
This definitely wreaks of a personal attack.
Anthony, I read the article that you wrote and felt that it was ok, but it could have been worded differently. From a womans point of view I felt that it was a bit condescending. There are two kinds of women that go to the gym, the kind that go there to mind there own business to do what they need to do either alone or with a personal trainer (no relation) and the other kind are the women that are looking for the attention of a male whether it be a stranger, a
I wasn’t trying to be condescending, Anonymous and I apologize if it reads that way.
I think many men can relate to my situation and like I previously stated, I didn’t write that I’m a no-it-all or that anyone should follow my advice. I simply wrote about a personal experience (details excluded) I had and how it ended poorly.
I tried to make the intro as general as possible, but obviously it struck a cord with some people.
(the rest of my comment)
“friend” or a significant other. As a physical therapist with an education background in muscle function, I would suggest that a good approach in training women is to verbally incorporate the exercise with the muscle action. For example, “if you want great shoulders, then let’s work the deltoids.” or “a toned upper arm needs tricep work” High reps with low weights will reap these results. Women will not bulk up like a men because we don’t have the testosterone like you and need to be educated on such issues if they don’t already know it. Keeping it focused is what we want. You are so correct in the fact that we are multitaskers. While we are performing one exercise, part of our brain is setting up for the next set. All the while we are controlling speed and correct form to decrease injury. Any trainer that would tell a woman “WOW, you are getting so big!”, shouldn’t be training anything.
To SM: What are we here, in high school? That attack was so infantile. First of all you don’t need to be “buff” or “ripped” to be able to train. Believe me, I have seen guys at the gym that don’t have a clue about muscle function and put themselves at a risk for injury with the speed and incorrect form that they are performing their reps.
Very sound advice Anonymous and I thank you for your comment. Hopefully you’ll continue to post here at BLF.